Thursday, August 26, 2010

Alanis Morissette

Yesterday my roommate texted me the lyrics to Alanis' dreadfully un-clever ditty, "Ironic". Shortly after doing this, a bird took a shit on the back of his neck. I sincerely believe this was the universe's way of making him pay for getting that awful piece of shit stuck in my head, thus prompting this post. If you were a sentient being in the 90's, you remember Alanis and her "Jagged Little Pill" record. The appeal of this horse-faced chanteuse was always a bit of an anomaly to me. The whole "pseudo-grunge-looking-angsty-chick" routine seemed to wear thin once it was announced that all of that angst was drummed up by Dave fucking Coulier. Yep. Then there was the video for "Thank You" where she stood there naked with what we all know was a giant muskrat-bush betwixt her legs, blurred out for your consideration and mine. The greatest enigma here is how she managed to land Ryan Reynolds. Even Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett made more sense to me. Its so perplexing, that the only conclusion I can come to is that the dude must have a fetish for chicks who look like they work in the photo-lab at Costco. I'm gonna stop trying to make sense out of a nonsensical world and leave you with the following dreck.

Here's what is available at the moment. I'll torture you with the rest once I find videos that some dick-diddling record company hasn't disabled the embedding for.